Monday, October 19, 2009

New beginnings, old endings

So I am now jobless. Without a paid, proper job. Unemployed.

I am happier than I have been for some time, relaxed, getting (slowly) organised, starting to have ideas about how to bring enough money in to pay the mortgage and feeling I could take on the entire world, I have so many ideas.

I've decided I am having a complete week off from any thoughts of work and getting up to date with the house work, college work and life and friends. Feeling so good about the whole process of packing my job in that I really cannot imagine working for someone else ever again.

My last day was a bit of a day from hell, but the rest of the weekend was fantastic and I feel like I did the right thing and maybe should have done it a year ago, but hindsight is a wonderful thing.

My friends are being so incredibly supportive, even trusting me to do their wedding photography for them when I have very little experience. Claire and Sonia, Sharon and Ashley you have no idea what your faith means to me.

I have been getting bookings for modelling, so I have regular work lined up, though it doesn't pay a huge amount it is work and some money coming in. I am also going to try and organise a life drawing class near me to see if I can make a small but again regular income from that. What I'd really like to do is organise some kind of community arts project in the north of Sheffield to create my own arts role here and support people who need art to help them through whatever issues they are dealing with, personal, professional or familial. I know I have to energy, drive and ideas to make all of this stuff work for me, but I just need to believe the next couple of months aren't going to be disastrous.

I have a canvas prepared for my major project at college, which I will be working on tomorrow, setting the whole day aside for it. Today is reserved for odd jobs and housework. Off to a meeting tonight for ATT, which is Art Though Textiles. I have some good friends there and will be able to make connections and network more effectively without having to be at a paid full time job. Although, don't get me wrong I am looking for paid work, I just need to not be doing it full time.

I resolved not to worry about money or paying for the things i need, I'll have enough cash work to keep me ticking over and I hope that I get enough temping work to be able to pay the big bills. And you know what, if I don't so what? Things will come together like they always do. I have faith that the universe will provide what I need when I need it. The universe has never let me down yet and always shows me the right way to go, even if sometimes I'm stubborn and won't go that way.

I must now go to the loo and eat some lunch, then ring the nice young man who is giving me a fridge on freecycle. Long story, but I'll tell it on another post.

Just thought I'd pop a couple of my latest experiments to see what you think. A mixture of monoprints and bleach and ink drawings.

1 comment:

Crazy Emma said...

I like the second picture. Glad you're feeling positive about things and have time to sort stuff out. I found just walking in the autumn sun this afternoon made me feel peaceful and less worried about stuff!
Did you get any decent photos of me and Jilly?